A poignant journey unfolded as family and friends gathered to support Robin, who made the courageous decision to enter hospice care. After a prolonged battle with cancer, treatments had ceased to be effective. Her close friend traveled three hours through severe weather to spend precious time with her, with support from her husband.
Amidst the torrential rain, doubts lingered about whether her presence could offer any comfort to Robin and her family. However, they reassured her that the visit would be significant for Robin.
Embracing the bittersweet moment
Upon arrival, the friend found Robin in a hospital bed relocated to the dining room for easier access. Dependent on oxygen, Robin’s spirit remained vibrant. A hospice nurse’s aide was present, providing essential support. As they embraced, a moment of connection unfolded as Robin clasped her friend’s hand.
Despite being heavily medicated, Robin displayed remarkable awareness. She recounted the pain leading to her emergency room visit, surgery, and subsequent days in intensive care. Accepting her fate, she expressed a peaceful embrace of hospice care, stating, “I don’t need my contact lenses or hearing aids anymore.”
Memories of our shared journey
Their friendship began nearly five decades prior during college, where both joined to establish Sonoma County Women Against Rape in the 1970s. Under the mentorship of a dedicated nurse, they trained as crisis counselors, providing vital support to survivors. This experience deepened their bond, leading to a lifetime of shared adventures.
Though life took them to different cities post-graduation, their hearts remained connected. Robin pursued a law career before transitioning to become a Methodist minister, while her friend carved a path in education as a principal. Their paths frequently crossed through letters and long-distance calls, sharing both triumphs and tribulations.
Reflecting on a life well-lived
During their final visit, they reminisced about their rich lives, acknowledging both struggles and joys. A cherished black-and-white photograph from 1977, depicting a moment from volunteering in Guatemala, was shared. The image featured Robin, her friend Betty, and her, alongside local women and children, sparking memories of those they had lost along the way.
As the visit concluded, they exchanged heartfelt hugs, affirming their love. The following day, Robin’s husband conveyed a touching moment: after the visit, Robin briefly awoke, insisting, “You need to give Becki something to eat.” Even in her final moments, her selflessness resonated.
The inevitability of loss
Robin’s passing serves as a stark reminder of the losses that accompany aging. A wise friend of the family once noted that as people grow older, the frequency of losing loved ones significantly increases. Now in her 70s, this sentiment resonates deeply.
The legacy Robin leaves behind is one of cherished memories and invaluable lessons in friendship and love. Her journey reinforces the importance of treasuring connections with others, both old friends and new. As she navigates this profound loss, she carries Robin’s spirit with her, forever grateful for the time they shared.
