When women express that they are “not good with money,” it often reflects years of societal conditioning and personal experiences. This statement is loaded with narratives of financial struggles, cultural expectations of gender roles, and a lingering sense of shame that can persist for decades.
The idea of being “good with money” is largely a myth. This misconception has hindered many women from embracing the financial empowerment that is rightfully theirs. But what if we could change this narrative?
Unpacking the myth of financial incompetence
Consider Jan, for example. At 69, she believed that managing finances was not her strength. Throughout her marriage, her husband took charge of their financial matters, leaving her to manage the household and children. When he passed away, Jan inherited their financial assets but also a lifetime of self-doubt. Despite her intelligence and capability, she felt burdened by the persistent thought: “You’re not good with money.”
Societal messages and their impact
This myth is deeply rooted in the messages many women receive from a young age. Often, the narrative suggests that finance is a male domain while women should focus on family and home. Media, financial institutions, and workplaces reinforce this idea, implying that “this area isn’t for you.” This creates a disconnection that can lead to feelings of inadequacy. If a mistake is made, it reinforces incompetence; any success is dismissed as mere luck.
If financial management has never been part of your responsibilities, how can you expect to feel confident about it? This absence of practice can lead women to believe they are incapable, especially during significant life transitions such as retirement, loss of a partner, or supporting grown children. In these pivotal moments, the internalized message that it is “too late” can be overwhelming.
Redefining your relationship with money
It is crucial to understand that believing you are “bad with money” is a limiting belief. You are not inherently incompetent; you simply have not been given the opportunity or encouragement to engage with financial matters. It’s important to challenge this internal narrative and recognize that it’s never too late to learn.
Building financial trust
Instead of striving for perfection or becoming a financial expert overnight, focus on building trust in your financial decisions. Each small decision contributes to a growing sense of confidence. For instance, the next time you catch yourself saying, “I’m not good with money,” try a simple exercise: reframe the narrative. Acknowledge that you are learning and growing rather than labeling yourself as inadequate.
This approach is not about fostering unrealistic optimism but about interrupting a negative cycle that no longer serves you. Financial confidence can be cultivated over time through practice and self-reflection. Start with manageable steps, such as tracking your expenses or setting small savings goals. Each action builds a foundation of evidence that you can indeed trust yourself.
Your journey to empowerment
The myth of being either “good” or “bad” with money can leave individuals feeling paralyzed. The real strength lies in adopting a mindset of curiosity and courage. If you have carried the burden of feeling inadequate in financial matters for years, remember: you are not broken or behind. You are simply at the beginning of a new chapter, ready to redefine your relationship with money.
As you embark on this journey, consider what financial narratives have shaped your life. How do they affect your decisions today? By recognizing and challenging these stories, you can pave the way for a more empowered financial future.
